Feel free to read about my issues.

Since I don't know how to wittily preface this, let's just jump right in here and get this out.

Since early November, I have made myself just actually stupidly sick over a decision to go back to school or not.  I sort of just jumped in, made a plan, went for it, and then I was sick about it for months.  I just couldn't decide it if was right, if it was wrong, if it was selfish, if it was stupid, if it was even what I wanted to do.

So I prayed.  Like, a lot y'all.  When I would open my eyes in the morning, this was the first thing I thought about.  I thought about it all day.  It consumed me.  How dumb, right?  For something so minor to consume me so much.

But the thing was, I couldn't, like, figure it out.  For as long as I could remember, what I would be going to school for was actually what I had always wanted to do.  So, to test the waters, I prayed that God would take that desire away from me if it wasn't right.

Sometimes he works overnight.

My heart was totally changed and I had a list of reasons why this would not be the right thing.  But, I also kept getting plenty of pushes to move forward.  Financially, it would have been a piece of cake...as in it would have been free.  Online classes would mean not so much time away from my man.  People were ironically put into the picture that kept making me think maybe this is okay.

So I took lots of steps toward this.  Signed up for classes.  Bought books.  Eventually I told important people in my life.  And I kept thinking the more I jump in the more comfortable I will be with this. And to top it off, it would mean only one more year in my job.  Glorious.

But deep down in my Holy Hunch, I knew that while this would be a good thing to do, it wouldn't be the best.  Because what God has planned for us is the best, not the plan we have for ourselves.  And I could not shake the feeling that He does indeed have something else for me, and to go to school would totally mess that up.

And so here I am. Same job.  Same place I was 2 months ago when I started all of this.  And that can be a little discouraging.  But I think there are big things to come.

And if, in a year, we're still sitting here together and nothing has happened, I guess you will need to take that up with the Man in charge...I think I'll be okay with it.

And on a lighter note!  We just got Netflix and plan to milk that this weekend!  Anyone seen anything good lately??

Happy Weekend, Friends.